The past five months

Fiona

It’s hard to believe five months have already passed since Fiona joined our family, hard and yet easy. Because in some ways it feels like our family couldn’t be complete without her, like she must have always been a part of us.

She turned five months old today and I’m definitely feeling all the feels. Disaster struck the highways today (a bridge stuck open) and it took me twice as long as usual to get home. I only got to see my girl for about 45 minutes before she went down. But that time was so special. She ate and we snuggled. She played on a blanket on the floor while I ate. She showed off new tricks.

Fiona rolled over onto her tummy, something we’ve seen evidence of, but never got to watch her do, then she looked at us and grinned as if to say “Did you see me? Did you really see me?”

Yes, my sweet girl, we see you.

Back and forth she rolled, trying out her new skill. Delighted with it, she squealed and grinned and laughed. Oh that we could all be delighted by such simple joys!

I was reminded by a friend today that instead of living each day like it’s your last, perhaps it should be lived like it’s your first.

My tiny Fiona epitomizes that. She greets each day with joy and exuberance. She smiles and coos, laughs and squeals in delight just at the dawning of a new day. She finds confidence and pleasure in a simple task. She is amused and delighted in a simple toy. Life is wonderful in Fiona’s eyes.

Fiona

I hope I learn something from her joie de vivre, from her whole-hearted love.

When she sees me now, she lights up. A grin spreads across her chubby cheeks and her dimple shows. She lifts her countenance to face mine and opens her chubby little baby arms wide. And when I reach for her, she leans into me, holding onto Mama with all the strength her tiny body possesses. I marvel at it. How do I create such a reaction in someone? I do not deserve her unreserved love. But she doesn’t yet know that.

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